Melodramatic
by Novelist Pup
Summary: It’s about Drama!Geeks, Itachi, Sasuke, and an overload of brotherly lurve. [AU, Uchihacest] [CRACK]


**Melodramatic**

Is this what I think it is?

…

Yeah, it is.

I had a sudden urge to write Uchihacest again, but could never find the right chance to. And then, this plot smacked me while I was sleeping, having dreams about gangsters from Compton playing Dance Dance Revolution SuperNOVA.

No, it isn't a spiraling romance about Gangsta!Sasuke and Preppy!Itachi and how it all started with a DDR Machine.

It's about Drama!Geeks, Itachi, Sasuke, and an overload of brotherly lurve.

Hot damn, I think I found my summary!

**Disclaimer: No thank you.**

* * *

"Oh… Itachi…"

Blush.

"Sasuke… are you resisting?"

Swoon.

"Why never, Itachi! I could never resist you… my love."

A press of lips on a temple.

"Then hold me as though your love is true… Or is it not?"

A grip along the shoulders.

"Ne'er shall you try a truer love than mine! A kiss for a kiss, my love is sealed!"

A smile.

"Shall you prove it? Or do I waste my affections on simple bark for one who can't even bite?"

Lips so close, breaths mingle into one.

"If proof is what you desire…then proof you shall receive…"

"_I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE!!!_" And a girl fainted. The two brothers moved away from each other with an overly exasperated roll of the eyes. Sasuke, the younger one with the deep black eyes, scoffed in annoyance.

"Would you mind staying silent until the lesson is complete?" he snapped. Itachi, the older one with the fierce crimson eyes, patted his brother's head.

"Now brother, you must commend her for at least getting this far in the class. I feel as though she did a fantastic job, since this is a Drama class after all." Itachi purred. Sasuke cocked an eyebrow but shrugged as he moved away to sit back down in his seat, Itachi moving to the front of the class.

"Now, class, what that was is an example of the classic 'romantic encounter' scene. Take into consideration that you don't need your brother to pull this off successfully. You also need don't need Miss Haruno's fabulous performance to interrupt it as well. Anybody who has questions?" A brunette boy with odd triangular markings under his eyes raised his hand. Itachi rolled his eyes.

"Yes, Mister Inuzuka?"

"How old are you?"

"I'm _twenty_, Mister Inuzuka."

"Isn't it illegal to be doing those sorts of things with your brother?"

"I'm _acting_, Mister Inuzuka. This class is meant to teach you how to do that kind of thing."

"…Are you sure you're twenty?"

"Shut up, Kiba."

Itachi threw a look of gratification at his brother. Sasuke gave him a _very_ subtle thumbs-up.

"Now, class, who wants to show me a good example of what we just did," Itachi requested. A shaky hand raised, and a more confident hand after.

"Miss Hyuuga? Is this what you really want?" Itachi asked with a snicker. Hinata nodded timidly and the teacher turned to Neji. "I hope you aren't doing this so you can be as close to the real example as possible."

"I just want to prove how awesome I am." Neji replied. Itachi and Sasuke and about the entire class rolled their eyes at the exact same time. Neji glared at them and walked to the front of the classroom confidently. Hinata followed, although much shyer and slow.

"Now… BEGIN." Itachi instructed. Neji and Hinata nodded and turned to each other.

"Oh… N-Neji…"

"Hinata…do I frighten you?"

"N-N-Never! My l-love f-for you is p-pure l-l-like an r-rose…!"

"But Hinata… roses whither and die all the time. Who am I to believe when you claim that your affections shall disappear in time?"

"_I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE!!!_" And another girl fainted. Sasuke banged his head on his desk as Neji took to looking really dangerous. And then he looked down to see that it was Hinata who fainted. Itachi looked at the class with his normally blank face and clapped his hands three times.

"Let us give a hand for their stupendous performance!"

----------------

The next day, in the same class, but missing Hinata and Sakura since one got a concussion from the fall, and the other is stuck in a nosebleed induced coma, Itachi stood before the students.

"Today's lesson is a bit more dramatic than you may be used to, but who cares. We'll be working on 'Angry Lover Encounter That Gradually Turns Back into True Love'. I'm not going to allow you little assholes to volunteer anymore, so I'm going to choose who makes the example today." Itachi said, not once cracking an expression. His eyes roamed across the class and he almost smirked as he found the perfect victim.

"Naruto, would you please come to the front?" he requested. Kiba sputtered in indignation.

"Why don't you call him by his surname like everyone else?!" he exclaimed. Itachi narrowed his eyes at the brown-haired teenager.

"Do I _know_ any of you on a personal basis?" he asked calmly. Kiba shook his head and Itachi sneered.

"Then you have your answer, now please be quiet. Naruto, you will be working with my little brother today." Itachi stated. The blond teenager stood up and stretched, and then wandered down the row of desks to stand in front of Itachi. Sasuke got up from his desk and did the same.

"Now… BEGIN." Itachi said. Sasuke and Naruto nodded and turned to each other, Naruto was grinning and Sasuke smirking. Suddenly, they turned away from each other, faces angry and unforgiving convincingly.

"You dare to speak to me once more?"

Smirk.

"Nay, words spilt out of your mouth before they yet dripped from mine."

Glare.

"Your banter is horribly lacking, and yet you still dare to face me again?"

Clench of fists.

"I face you not! Tis' opposite we face yet our hearts are one!"

Confused blinking.

"Nonsense spouts from your mouth, yet a claim of love was made in the meantime. Insanity or true?"

Small smile.

"The truth it is, as my anger is a swirling vortex of butterscotch pudding…and you are the spoon, my love!"

"I've got to stop letting you guys pull these acts out your ass…" Itachi muttered. Naruto grinned.

"Aww, don't be mad Itachi! Just wait until tomorrow's lesson!" he exclaimed. Itachi rolled his eyes as Sasuke looked suspicious.

"What's going on next lesson?" he demanded. Naruto looked at him and grinned.

"It isn't my duty to tell you this, sorry!" The blond replied. Sasuke looked rather pissed, until Itachi put his hand on his head.

"Do not worry, little brother, I promise you it won't be that bad."

----------------

It ended up being that bad.

The next day, in the same class, as our favorite girls had returned to their favorite class EVAR, Itachi cleared his throat.

"Today's lesson is _very_ special, and is essential in any good romance play, movie, or presentation. We are going to try the popular 'Forbidden First Kiss Shared Between Forbidden Lovers' act, and no, I'm still not allowing anymore volunteers, so put your hands down." Several groans sounded. "This can only work out between professionals, whom only two of us can almost claim and _I_ can state proudly. Now, Sasuke, if you'll please come to the front?"

Sasuke's eyes widened in revelation. So _this_ was the super-secret lesson? Intriguing.

The younger brother got out of his desk and walked to his brother, automatically going into 'DRAMA' (**D**ark **R**evolution **A**nd **M**aybe **A**ngst) mode. Itachi still looked blank and uncaring, but Sasuke knew better. They hadn't done this kind of thing before, and the younger didn't exactly know what he should've been expecting.

"Now, little brother, just follow my words." Itachi instructed. Sasuke blinked in confusion.

"Oh…kay?"

"Fantastic. Now, let us begin."

Itachi grabbed Sasuke by his waist and leaned dangerously close to his younger brother.

"Dearest Sasuke… have you the slightest idea of what you do to me?"

Blush.

"Perhaps my answer would be no, what shall you do then Itachi?"

Smirk.

"As long as mother and father resist of coming across us, I shall simply place my lips upon yours!"

Smile.

"Tis' my first kiss to be stolen by my own brother? I daren't describe how scandalous it shall be once discovered!"

Lips come closer.

"Then we shall insure that we are never found…"

And Itachi kissed Sasuke, full on the lips. Sakura and Hinata were immediately caught as they fell out their chairs, Naruto was smirking, and Kiba was spazzing out.

"I _KNEW_ he wasn't acting!"

Itachi and Sasuke did not hear this, as they were completely engrossed in things that were not apart of the normality, such as, _themselves_. At some point, they even fell on the ground and Sasuke lost his shirt, and the class watched in avid fascination until someone interrupted them.

"_I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE!!!_" And Kiba fell over. The two brothers snapped out of whatever trance they were in and stood up quickly and awkwardly. Sasuke put his shirt back on as Itachi cleared his throat.

"And that is how you do whatever hell act this was. Now, go crazy and create a distraction as Sasuke and I find a closet."

**END**

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This is crack.

This was not supposed to make sense.

This was meant to make you smile, or laugh, or feel positive emotions.

I hope I succeeded.

(GODDAMMIT the Waka Laka song won't leave me the fuck alone!)


End file.
